Why Respite Care Is So Important

Today, I was very fortunate to have Jennifer come and watch Raquel so I could briefly go to work, take Gabby to lunch, and then sit in on her summer literature class. I've said it before that one-on-one time with Gabby is very much a necessity right now, and today was another perfect example of that.

This morning wasn't the best. I mentioned yesterday that Raquel has been waking up earlier and earlier these days, and today was not an exception. We started our morning at 3:30am. I tried everything to get her back to sleep and finally said, "Screw it!" and made coffee. She had breakfast at 4:30am, watched a little television, and then Mike heard us shortly after 5:30am and asked what was going on. I told him that I was just about out of patience - AGAIN - and he said to go take a break while he dealt with her. About 20 minutes later, she was fast asleep. I guess she wanted her dad.

And then it was Groundhog's Day. She woke up around 8am, and we did the exact same routine: breakfast, a little tv, listened to music. I really didn't know what to make of it all but once I saw the enormous smile on Raquel's face when she saw Jennifer walk through the door, I had really high hopes for the day and looked forward to the alone time I was about to have with Gabby.

I really shouldn't have text messaged Jennifer at lunch to see how it was going but couldn't resist. I was hoping for a good report, but apparently Raquel was carrying on with her just like she has been with me and Jennifer wrote back: "Not a good day", which is really surprising because she's always very easy for Jenn to take care of, or at least to redirect. Today, it was hit or miss with her. Finally, she fell asleep and slept for about 1 1/2 hours.

Even though I knew Raquel was being difficult, I knew she was in good hands and was able to really enjoy my time with Gabby. She was an absolute doll the entire day, from being with me at work, to lunch, to watching her in class. I had so much fun seeing her have so much fun in a literature class!! There are only about 10 kids in it and everyone took turns reading out loud, doing skits about the stories they read, and playing a really cool tic-tac-toe game played with word endings. I'll definitely be doing that with her at home. What a great way to get them excited about creating words! And Gabby was so proud to have me in class. She kept looking towards me, giving me the thumbs up when she answered questions, and was just beaming the whole time.

So why is respite so important to me? Because when you are with a special child all the time, you need a break from it all. When you are with ANY child, you need a break from it all. But at least if you have a "typical" kid, they are much easier to hand over to others. Jennifer knows that Mike works 6 days a week and has limited time around here to help and that the responsibility of it all is pretty much on me and, sadly, Gabby. And she feels bad that she can't help more. I'm just thankful for the 4 hours a week I get and that she works to give other families 4+ hours a week so they can have their break. Most respite workers are highly qualified to deal with special needs children & adults, the elderly, and are certified in CPR, but make very little money in doing so. I think that is a really sad thing.

Today when I came home and saw my little curly locks - and knew at any given time she would, and did, start up - I had patience and was ready be a Mom again. And that is what really is important.